Being 24th on May 24
Every year always gives a different impression.
Two years ago, I received a prayer for my thesis to be launched and to graduate quickly on my birthday. Last year, I got a prayer so that I feel comfortable and fit at my first ever job. This year, everyone is praying for me to get a better and decent job.
Even though it doesn’t seem to change, life always has a long journey from year to year. It’s impossible for us today to be stuck as we were three years ago. Even though it looks small and trivial, there are always new things that we learn, understand, or skip. There are always things we just found out about today and never thought we would have known it years ago.
I am grateful to always be surrounded by good people. Even though I often don’t get what I imagined, I’m grateful because it always goes well.
24 years sounds scary. Even some people are surprised to hear it. But not without reason, because this number shows maturity which is hard to bear. There is a burden that will continue to haunt you for years to come, asking to be prioritized.
For some reason, getting older this time feels more emotional. I realize that the journey to 24 years isn’t easy. There are days that I have tried so hard to get through the past year. Maybe that’s why I’m so sentimental at the age of 24 on the 24th. Only myself knows how hard it is to survive to be there on this special day. And I’m very proud of that.
For me, 24 years is the beginning of my journey to start my own life. Not hiding in my parents or my friends’ back. Like Taylor Swift ever said, “You’re on your own now”.
The funny thing is that life is like this, you feel like you can’t be sincere. But when you live it without trying hard to think about how to be sincere yourself, without realizing that a month or even a year has passed with you slowly recovering on your own.
That’s how I felt when the 24th yesterday finally came. Struggle to feel sincere with a situation that seems to have its back to me, suddenly feels like the wind.
Because again, no matter how long you stop romanticizing (anyone’s) mistakes in the past, the present will continue.
Don’t let yourself get so wrapped up in the past that you forget the life you need to build in the future and end up blaming the past again.
